Stay Neutral

My son and I spend a lot of time in the car going to and from soccer practice and games. During a particularly stressful season, a college friend of mine who is now an athletic mental coach (learn more about her at the end of blog!) turned us onto Trevor Moawab. He too was an athletic mental guru who worked with a number of NFL and college teams and wrote It Takes What It Takes and Getting to Neutral. My son and I listen to the audio books on the way to practice. He teaches you the importance of living in the present, putting aside emotional decision-making and focusing on the things you can control in the moment without dwelling on what has already happened. Think neutrally. Focus on what needs to be done. It simply “takes what it takes.” It’s so easy to get emotional while playing a game, and my son realized those feelings were getting in the way of doing the next right thing. He was dwelling on mistakes he made and having trouble moving past it. Trevor’s books and strategies have given my son (and me!) a great game plan for moving forward and controlling what can be controlled. 

So how does thinking neutrally apply to the way we dress? Not long ago, I was helping a friend with her outfit for a casual holiday party. We were on Facetime and she was showing me all her tops, sweaters and jeans options. We settled on a cute pair of cream bootleg jeans, floral top and a fun greenish cardigan sweater with puffy sleeves. In a panic, she thought she didn’t have a pair of shoes that would work with those light jeans. She wanted to scrap the whole outfit. Instead, I had her scan over her shoes and saw she had a pair of light-colored skin booties. I knew the texture would be cool and the pointed toe sticking out of her her jeans would elongate her leg. She wasn’t convinced, but I assured her the neutral worked. I feel like I am constantly using that phrase, “It’s a neutral, it goes!” What that means is that it doesn’t scream at you. It’s pleasing to the eye and doesn’t conflict with other parts of the outfit. Animal prints, creams, whites, browns, blacks, grays and navys are all considered “neutral.” They don’t need to be center stage. As you put together outfits, consider colors from the same family. Browns easily go with khaki, creams, yellows and golds, since they all are close to each other on the color wheel. Blues go with other blues but could also go with creams, browns and grays. 

As you dress for the upcoming days, consider staying neutral. For example, last week I was off to a soccer tournament. I knew I was going to wear black jeans, black /cream/yellow sneakers  and a cream sweater. The easy coat option would’ve been black but instead, I mixed it up with an olive puffer vest. Why? Because it’s a neutral. It goes but doesn’t necessarily match. Sometimes being matchy-matchy is too predictable and a little boring. Staying in the neutral family adds some interest. I could have easily chosen an animal print or any other neutral puffer vest and those would have worked too. 

Take the emotion out of dressing and make choices that complement each other. There is a time and place for a bright top or suit. But there are also days where more subdued neutrals are called for. The same goes for life, as I’ve learned from Trevor. If you’re having trouble at work or with a personal situation, ask yourself, ‘What does this situation call for me to do? Do I need to be reactive or can I take my emotion out of it?’ Maybe all we really need to do is slip on our  snakeskin booties and put it in neutral!

Oh By the Way, consider these neutral clothing/shoes/bags options to incorporate into your wardrobe. 

Oh By the Way part 2, my son and I highly recommend Trevor’s books. It Takes What It Takes is great for your athlete – especially the boys who love football – as it includes behind-the- scenes details from players like Russell Wilson. The second book, Getting to Neutral, applies to both athletes and anyone who’s looking to improve their habits. Lastly, we love our friend Amy Oliphant, who owns Transcend Mental Training. Being a lifelong athlete herself, she understands how difficult it can be to persevere mentally for young athletes. Check out her Instagram and Facebook pages.